The Life of Patricia Rahe
Christmas with the Family
–adapted from the eulogy by her granddaughter, Pamela Hicks Robinson, BSN, RN, SDSU ‘07
Patricia Marie Laubender was born August 21, 1931 in Los Angeles, in the depths of the Great Depression. She attended Annunciation Grammar School and was always proud of her education at Dorsey High School. She met her husband George Rahe while babysitting for his sister Mary’s children.
Patricia Laubender worked as a secretary for the FBI as a young woman, her boss always boasting that he had chosen the best secretary as she had scored near genius on the entrance exams. Through her job she was able to go on undercover operations, which must have taken a great deal of courage considering her lack of training.
Pat and George continued to date through George’s deployment in Korea, until their marriage on August 23, 1952. This date was strategically picked to be after summer school and 2 days after Pat’s 21st birthday, so that she could drink at her own wedding. They had 4 children in the next 8 years, while George was in school. She managed all matters of the house through 13 years of graduate school, eventually earning her PHT, Putting Hubby Through. She continued to take care of all around her until her death.
After the completion of graduate school, the family picked up and moved to Carmel. There, after her children had reached their teenage years, Pat returned to the workforce, first as a secretary then venturing into real estate and managing rental properties.
After seeing all of her girls married, she became a grandmother at the age of 51, at which time she scolded my mother that she was too young to become a grandmother. I think the role of young grandmother grew on her as she lived to watch her grandchildren grow up and was able to babysit and create so many memories.
George had a massive stroke in 1985 and then completed many months in a rehab hospital program. The doctors told Nana that there was no way she could care for him and that she must put him in a nursing home. Ever determined, she told them “watch me,” and took him home. She accomplished what the doctors thought unimaginable, with Poppy living and thriving at home until his death in January 2012.
My grandmother was ever committed to her family. She made sure all 4 of her children completed college, and then continued by providing babysitting while my aunt returned to school to become a nurse. She continued this commitment to her grandchildren, even putting up with me sleeping on her floor every week for my summer Nursing Internship. She was always glad to help, and her charity and generosity extended beyond our family. Nana Rahe thought it only fitting that she should memorialize her lost daughter with a scholarship for aspiring nurses and so her charity lives on.
After my Uncle Paul had spent every weekend with them in Oceanside for over a year, the three of them decided they were compatible and moved in together when Uncle Paul bought his house. They lived together for 3 years and 9 months. Shortly after the move, Nana was diagnosed with dementia. She faced this new hurdle with the same courage and determination she applied to the rest of her life. As things progressed, caregivers came into the home to help care for her and Poppy. But don’t worry, she never needed any help. She was determined to be independent and self sufficient to the end of her life.
In the last months of her life she enjoyed fussing in her garden, watering her plants, visiting family and going for walks around her complex. Always fiercely independent, even in the ER visit before her death she insisted that she was fine and tried to walk out several times. All the while she was successfully convincing my mother and I that we had been foolish to bring her there. Although her death was sudden and a shock to all of us, we can be grateful that she died without pain or fear, cared for by her loving family as she cared for us for so many years.
She was defined by her courage, intelligence, and determination; never letting anything stand in the way of what she thought was right. She is an inspiration.
She died on May 26, 2012, four months to the day after the death of her husband of 59 years. We will always love and miss her.